torsdag 10 september 2015

Last day at Antioch University

I came to the U.S. on January 4th 2012. I didn't know a soul in Santa Barbara. Wow, everything that's happened since that day is just..waaay too much to even start addressing.

Now that I'm so close to the end, it has pretty much forced me to think back on all the memories I have from these 3 years and 9 months. What most people might not know is that I was only supposed to stay for 5 months and try the experience, then go back to my life in Sweden. I ended up wanting to get my marketing certificate, after that I thought I could at least get my AA, and after that I decided to get my BA. Double Bachelor's Degrees in Business/Entrepreneurship and Marketing.
Here I am now,about to walk to Antioch for the last day of classes ever. Ever. 

I have finished my education in the United States. It's been a journey of no other kind, and I've met so many people that have either inspired me, supported me or taught me something. Friends that I've made are not friends anymore, and I've had acquaintances who very quickly turned in to friends. Teachers that have motivated me, (fooled me), kept me on track, and forced me to learn new things. 
My time at City College and Antioch University could be turned in to a reality show of no other kind. 

I have debated moving back to Sweden 3 times, I have thought I would do it every single time, but something major always happens that makes me stay. I watched a documentary the other day that's called "the power of the heart", and Paulo Coelho said that when you resist or doubt your life's real purpose, life will push you back 3-4 times in order for you to understand what you need to do. Let's see what life has to say this time. I already know what SB has to offer me and even though that is huge, I need to see what Stockholm has to offer me in order for me to want to stay there.

I am closing the book of being a student in Santa Barbara, and I am opening up a completely blank chapter. I still don't know where I will be when 2016 starts, all I know is that I am going home in 6 days. HOME. I need it so bad, because I haven't felt like myself lately. I allowed myself to let go of emotions and just go with everything. I have been buried in school work, seeing people, drinking too much wine, said things I haven't meant, and all because I turned into some sort of robot.

Things do happen for a reason though, and yesterday night while I was out with a bunch of Antioch people, something happened inside of me and I just felt this urge for grounding myself back home in Sweden. At least for a while, right..
The wild horse in me keeps on running.

I wish I knew exactly what I need. 
Wow, As I wrote that sentence I know that I already know. 

To be continued then..



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