Flashbacks from another time

January 4th 2012

I was standing at Arlanda airport feeling like the loneliest  person in the world. I was about to leave Sweden and move to Santa Barbara. I will never ever forget how I felt. My future was completely unwritten and it freaked me out. As much as us humans are aware of the fact that the future is actually always unclear, we like to think we know sort of what our week will look like..and our weekend, our month, our year.

I didn't even have a home in Santa Barbara. Didn't know a soul. So yes, I was anxious. 

What happened as I arrived in LA and met my future roommates for the next 5 months at LAX is all history. Amazing history, stored in a very special place in my heart. 

Gosh..all the people I've met. All the friendships I've made. All the goodbye's I've had to make. All the love I've felt. All the love I feel.

My dad asked me when I was young what I wanted to be when I grew up. I didn't have an answer to that, but I told him what I knew;

"Dad, I wanna live where the sun is always shining, and I want to live really close to the beach".

When I post pictures of leadbetter beach now which is right next to my house, my dad always comment;

"Your beach."

I managed to make my dream come true.

You can do whatever you want. Set your mind to it. Use the power and force that's in your heart and soul. Don't be fearless, be scared as shit so you can feel brave. What do you want to do? 

I'm about to make a really big change again very soon, and yes I'm scared. But I am using that fear to build strength. Because there is no better feeling in the world than being brave. Instead of seeing scary or unknown situations as something you recent, try to turn it around and think to yourself "Fuck yes, I can do this! And I will feel amazing afterwards!" Bravery is an amazing and powerful skill. 

I actually enjoy feeling a bit anxious/worried/scared about doing something new, or do a big speech etc, because I get to prove to myself that I can do it. 

Don't wait. Don't say; "Next time I'll do it". Do it when the opportunity comes. Do it for you.