Lost my mind only to find it again

I've lost my mind these last couple days.
It went out the backdoor along with my lack of sleep.

I'm stressing, real bad. I know better, and I still meditate, do my yoga, my workouts, but somehow my mind decided to just stop fighting the stress and let it out. I needed it though.

Jeez, I haven't been this stressed since before that Christmas break in 2013. It's the pressure of getting all the school stuff done, but not just done, I have this need to hand in papers that stick out and that the teacher can actually enjoy reading, plus, crush my presentations. That's what it's all about for me because public speaking is weirdly enough a passion of mine. I always look around the room as I stand up there and I need to make sure everyone is paying attention and likes what I talk about, and if not everyone does, I feel like I've failed. I guess this time around, I am finishing 5 papers all at the same time and I just need to structure everything. I know I'll be fine though, and I usually do better when I'm not very prepared at my speeches, because I love to improvise, and never use notes.

I have talked about the stress now, I've dwelled, I've felt sorry for myself, and my psychotic thoughts that show up when I don't sleep enough have paid me a visit. I am not a fan of feeling sorry for myself and to walk around feeling like a basket case though so now I'm just gonna suck it up, drink some red wine nightly for inspiration, finish all my work, be awesome, hold my last presentation at 7 pm Wednesday night June 10th and hop on the airbus to LAX Thursday morning at 7 am.

All you wonderful people in Sweden, I will greet you all with the biggest smile on my face and I will feel light as a feather when this quarter is done. I can't wait to see all of you!

And yesterday btw, me and Jenny celebrated 2 years as roommates, and the very first day we moved in together, we said we'd have plenty of wine nights with swedish sticky chocolate cake, but yesterday was the first night we actually did it! My cake was a huge success among us, Sandy and Jenny's parents. It was a really good night.