We can lack confidence in our selves and what we are capable of, and we don't think we're good enough, successful enough, beautiful enough,..and the list goes on.
Why is that? I believe it's because of all the unwritten rules of society.
We are all unique, we all have our own different needs and wants. But, many of us share the same dreams and goals in life. Like finding a partner, starting a family, excel careerwise, living a healthy life etc. These goals have somehow managed to become "norms" in our society, and in some ways our society have also put "age/time limits" and "right and wrong labels" on these goals.
The important thing to always remember, is that even though we may share some goals in life, we are still very different individuals who walk on this earth;
-What is important in a partner for me, will not be the same things that are important in a partner for you.
-Starting a family for one person might mean having just one baby or no babies because my partner in life is all I need and together we are a family. Staring a family for another person might mean having 4 babies, one dog and 2 rabbits.
-Exelling at work might mean becoming a successful CEO for one person, and excelling at work for someone else could mean keeping the fridge super clean at their stand at the local fishmarket.
-Living a healthy life can be working out 6 days a week and be a vegetarian, or it could just as well mean meditating once a day and try to drink more water.
So even though we might share some goals, it doesn't mean that we all want it at the same time, or that we want the exact same things. That would be crazy! Thank God we are all different...right?
So, it's up to US to decide what is right for us. No one else knows what's best for you except you. But the problem is that the norms of our society is imprinted in our minds wether we like it or not. So the problematic lies in that many of us actually forget what we want and need and what's best for us, because we think we believe that the norms of society is what's right.
So, I think it's important to figure out what's right for us. Or what feels right.
-Who has the right to tell you that by the age for 35 you should have kids? You might not even want kids.
-Who has the right to tell you what successful is? Successful for you might mean just getting out of bed, and that's a small win every day.
-Who has the right to tell you that you have to study 4 years after high school? You might want to be a freelancing writer.
-Who has the right to tell you that if you are single by a certain age, you should be pitied? F**k that, you will stay single for as long as it takes, until you find the right person and don't settle for less.
You are worthy and absolutely good enough. If we always look for more (based on the unwritten rules) and think that what we are and have right now is not good enough, ask yourself: who is to decide this for me but me?
My mantra is to always do everything in my power to become the best version of me based on what I want and what's right for me.
Because you can always work on improving yourself, for you and not for the sake of our society.
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