When love wins.

I'm frustrated.
I have never been this frustrated before. But do you know what the weird twisted thing is? I feel a strange sort of contentment from it..from all the drama.

I was a strange kid growing up. Hiding from friends so they couldn't drag me along to the parks and play, and laying in bed with music in my ears, staring at the ceiling, was a big part of my childhood. I have always loved thinking. Daydreaming about a life that is different from all the others. Fantasizing about a fulfilled life, a happy life. I knew my life would be different.

What I always dreamed of is a life with a very important meaning. I want to explore, reveal truths, be inspired and most importantly; I want to be loved. A crazy, passionate, desperate, hot, amazing, true true true love.
That was the biggest part of my daydreams as a little girl. Staring at that white ceiling, dreaming about the boy who would set my heart on fire and keep it burning for the rest of my life.

One word can summarize my daydreams even as a grown woman; d r a m a.
I'm one hell of a drama loving person. Well, at least in my daydreams. I dream about a tough but super strong love. Filled with obstacles to climb.
Because to me, there is no greater proof of the crazy intense love that I want, than to move mountains to reach it.



I am ready to climb. I am ready to fight.
My heart is still pounding, my hands are shaking and my body is filled with all the energy I need to get through this rough steeplechase course. But. The import But; I have no right to do it.
And that is why I won't do it.
Your hand is not mine to hold.


This is where the contentment plays a part though. I spend a big part of my days doing what I love; just thinking. Listen to music that gives me goosebumps, stare out over the ocean, close my eyes, and daydream about the day when all this drama will make sense..

..the day when love wins.

.....